Hope????

Just got home from a weekend in California visiting M at her rehab for a "family weekend".
This consists of families attending an all day workshop for two days with a therapist who teaches you about addiction, boundaries, recovery, etc.
It only takes being in a room with other families and addicts to realize you are blessed and don't have it quite so bad. Extremely sad!

We arrived Friday and had a great day to ourselves driving around, eating and actually going to the movies. Amazing what normal life can be. Our bubble was burst by David receiving a text from M's old boyfriend finally admitting he needs help and a phone message from M while in the movie that she was having a hard time, wanted to go home and was done with it. Of course we spent the rest of the night playing devils advocate with each other and imaging the worst. They had been in contact with each other, they were scheming, etc.

The next day, we finally got to meet up with M. She looked awesome. No longer my skinny strung out waif. She has gained weight, her skin and hair actually look normal and healthy and she had the biggest smile on her face. Beautiful.

Our worries from the night before that kept us up all night were for naught. She has not been in contact with her ex and has ignored all his communication, which leads us to believe he is panicking. Her desire to go home was in conjunction with her having her first strong desire to use since she has detoxed and been clean.

We got to spend a day with her and took a leisurely drive down the Pacific Coast Highway, eating lunch by the sea in Laguna Beach and ending up at Mission San Capistrano. I had been there before and it had had a healing/calming affect on me and my wish was for her to feel the same. Without me sharing my experience, she felt the same.

It was very hard to say goodbye, but we will see her again soon. She comes off of "house arrest" this week and will have some freedoms to move around on her bike and get phone privileges back to call us.

She is starting her healing process and it is a long road to recovery but for now she seems to be on the right path but I also now it is easy to be on a high when you are in the safety net of rehab.

For now I will take every positive one day at a time.